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Author: Subject: Billys advice thread:
Billy
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[*] posted on 6-8-2004 at 12:00 PM
Billys advice thread:


On advice from Slybitch:

Quote:
Originally posted by sly bitch
BILLY YOU SHOULD MAKE AN ADVICE THREAD



I have taken it upon myself to make an Advice thread, where I will from time to time, deliver gems of wisdom as well as handy hints and tips which are intended to keep the cogs of life well oiled and running as smoothly as can be.

so with no further ado:

Ladies, there is nothing as ungraceful as a fat woman falling off a horse. If you wish to appear elegant and in harmony with your surrounds, yet your gracious curves are enhanced by surplus femininity (i.e you are a fat cunt) choose forms of transport other than the noble 'Equus caballus' to make your arrivals and departures, such as Oxen or Lorrys.

and

Gentlemen, Don't pay near $150.00 to have extra memory put in your MPC2000xl by a local specialist. Simply get your friend to buy 2 x 16meg chips off ebay for $29aus including postage and handling and look up how to install it yourself on the internet, as it is really quite a simple procedure, basically just a matter of slotting it in.




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[*] posted on 6-8-2004 at 12:01 PM


Quote:
Originally posted by Billy
Ladies, there is nothing as ungraceful as a fat woman falling off a horse

word




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[*] posted on 6-8-2004 at 12:04 PM


Are you taking questions?



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[*] posted on 6-8-2004 at 12:09 PM


Quote:
Originally posted by Billy

Ladies, there is nothing as ungraceful as a fat woman falling off a horse. If you wish to appear elegant and in harmony with your surrounds, yet your gracious curves are enhanced by surplus femininity (i.e you are a fat cunt) choose forms of transport other than the noble 'Equus caballus' to make your arrivals and departures, such as Oxen or Lorrys.


So very true.

This advice has not been taking lightly by the State of Illinois, where it is currently illegal for a woman over 200 pounds to ride a horse in shorts.
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[*] posted on 6-8-2004 at 12:13 PM


how imforative but my mpc is alrady maxed

now how do i stop this acute sensation of warm thick red liquid coming from my eye?




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[*] posted on 6-8-2004 at 12:14 PM


hah. we need more obese-person-related laws.

then the police can get to work cleaning our streets of this scourge.
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[*] posted on 6-8-2004 at 12:16 PM


Quote:
Originally posted by MC eryth
now how do i stop this acute sensation of warm thick red liquid coming from my eye?

just :jerkoff:




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[*] posted on 6-8-2004 at 12:17 PM


Of Course! :frog:



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[*] posted on 6-8-2004 at 12:24 PM


:jerkoff: is the answer to all lifes problems.



No more moving imagery goodness.

Filthy swines.
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[*] posted on 6-8-2004 at 12:36 PM


Zaw: Most certainly.




handy hint: Save money on expensive refrigerators.... a running hair dryer or heater placed in any house hold freezer makes an ideal cool-storage compartment for your milk and other perishables.




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[*] posted on 6-8-2004 at 12:40 PM


Can you suggest a simple, cost-effective, yet environmentally safe way to clean windows?



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[*] posted on 6-8-2004 at 12:46 PM


Billy, I'm 13 years old and live in Dandenong. My boyfriend has been wanting to have sex with me but mum says I'm too young and could get pregnant.

How do I tell my boyfriend that we should wait?




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Billy
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[*] posted on 6-8-2004 at 12:48 PM


Quote:
Originally posted by ZAW
Can you suggest a simple, cost-effective, yet environmentally safe way to clean windows?



an old sock thick sock turned inside out, preferreably an 'Explorer' or something with a thick towel like quality on the inside, worn on the hand, dipped into a bucket of water with only a small amount of window cleaner should do the trick.




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Billy
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[*] posted on 6-8-2004 at 12:51 PM


Quote:
Originally posted by Luke.
Billy, I'm 13 years old and live in Dandenong. My boyfriend has been wanting to have sex with me but mum says I'm too young and could get pregnant.

How do I tell my boyfriend that we should wait?



slice up your gash with a blade.... the hideous sight its gaping scabbed up wounds leaking pus and blood should turn even the hardiest of sex pests running for their magzine collection!

the healing process should buy you just enough time! (wink)




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[*] posted on 6-8-2004 at 12:51 PM


You're not very good at this, are you Billy?

Newspaper and hot soapy water (from an environmentally friendly laundry or dish detergent).




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its old and boring.... a bit like me really....
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[*] posted on 6-8-2004 at 12:58 PM


metho and water...and newspaper ^^
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[*] posted on 6-8-2004 at 01:00 PM


When did meths become environmentally friendly?



[quote][i]Originally posted by REZ_Erection[/i]
its old and boring.... a bit like me really....
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[*] posted on 6-8-2004 at 01:06 PM


Starving African Children:

A wide brimmed hat with corks hanging from strings dangling around the edges will keep pesky flies at bay, whilst adding a 'true blue down under touch' to any famine.




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[*] posted on 6-8-2004 at 01:06 PM


when the pic in your sig shrunk



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[*] posted on 6-8-2004 at 01:27 PM


i need some advice...anyone...should i tell my fiance i dont want kids before or after the marriage?
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[*] posted on 6-8-2004 at 01:30 PM


before.



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[*] posted on 6-8-2004 at 01:32 PM


before would be good
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[*] posted on 6-8-2004 at 01:43 PM


i have a horrible laugh, people always comment on how bad, or how 'evil' it is, what should i do? should i try a new laugh? what's the best option?
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[*] posted on 6-8-2004 at 01:46 PM


I am serious when I say this is the most entertaining thread ever.



You are now about to witness the strength of net knowledge.
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[*] posted on 6-8-2004 at 01:49 PM


is punching my pregnant girlfriend in the stomach a safe and effective abortion method??

or should i just poison her instead?




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